FAMILY UPDATES - SEPTEMBER!

Dallas and I were saying this morning that it feels like this is the first week since June that we have had a "regular" routine! 

So many good things have happened since June, and they're also just simply things that make life busy.

The kids got out of school at the end of June and were home till mid-August. 

In July our new missionary co-workers moved to Guadalajara and we spent quite a bit of time with them in the summer, which was so great! 

On July 23, Salomón moved in with us (our 4 year old!) and as good as he did in adjusting, it still means adjusting for all of us. We took a family holiday together shortly after he moved in, which was such a great bonding time

In August all 4 boys started school and my parents came to visit for 10 days! Salo and Sofi bonded so quickly with my parents, as they had seen them on Skype and we talked a lot about them before they came, so it was so neat to see.

My mom and dad

And last week we had representatives from our Board of Missions in Canada here for a week, which meant meetings and people in our home all week, also good and also busy.

So, life continues to be busy but we are settling into a routine now of ministry, regular meetings, school, homework times, kid's activities, etc....at least for the next few weeks ;)

Here's just a quick update on each of us these days!

Carter (aka Chaí) - age 11, grade 6

This summer, Carter got into camping quite a bit. He went to Bible camp for a week, he spent a night camping with Scout friends, and he did a two day hike and camp-out on the mountain together with Dallas, Logan, and our friend, Juanca. 

He also loves spending time with his friends and once every week or two he is invited to someone's house after school or has a friend over here to the house. 

He just finished swimming lessons this week and was asked to be on a competitive swim team. He chose not to though, as it means swim practice every day of the week. Instead, he is going to join the Scouts program on Saturday afternoons and is also taking piano lessons during the week.

He also instigated starting a YouTube channel together with Logan and Brady :) We'll see where that goes. It's private for now but they like to do mostly food challenges at this point.

He also loves to draw, cook, play with the neighbor kids, and read books.

Logan (aka Logey, Logancito, Gancito) - age 9, grade 4

Logan also really enjoyed the hiking trip this summer and spent his time there hunting for mushrooms and taking pictures of them (he found about 10 different kinds). He also went to Bible camp for a week.

He just finished swimming lessons as well, and is going to start the Scouts program and is also taking piano lessons. As you can see we generally have our kids in the same activities ;) so far they like the same things more or less and it makes it easier with multiple kids and taking them to their activities.

He is a curious kid and likes to see how things work and what he could do with different things.

He also likes to draw and make up stories and comics, he loves Calvin & Hobbes, he likes to play with the neighbor kids, swim, ride bike, and bug people.

Logan is also a very sweet kid and loves to play with Sofi and Salo. He often asks to help put Sofi to bed and will sing and pray with her.

Brady (aka Tobey, Tom) - age 8, grade 2

Brady turned 8 on August 14 and asked us to do a friends party and then to surprise him for his family party. He invited several friends over to the house to make pizzas and play, and then we took them all to see a movie. For his family party we went and played mini-golf and went for lunch.

Brady is a people person and loves to talk to people. He is not afraid of very many things and likes to see what he is capable of doing. He prides himself on being everyone's friend at school and got an award from his teacher in June for being the funniest in the class :)

He likes to roller blade, bike, play with legos, swim, and play with his friends. He also just finished swimming lessons, is taking piano lessons, and will be joining Scouts.

He wants to be a teacher when he grows up and he already has such a great way with younger kids, explaining how things are done. Salo is in preschool here and has homework and Brady has a much better way of explaining things to him than I do! Maybe it's a patience thing :)

Salomón (aka Salo, Salomoncito, Salemono) - age 4, Pre-school

Salo has been doing so amazing since he moved in. He has adapted way more quickly than anyone expected and it's so good to see him flourishing. He shares a room with the "big" boys and loves to copy anything they do. 

He speaks 100% Spanish but is starting to learn some English. We speak to him mostly in Spanish, but he hears English all day both at school (it's bi-lingual) and at home when we talk among each other and he's starting to understand quite a bit. 

Having a 4 year old again is interesting as we get used to hearing "por qué" (why?) all day long! But he is learning so much about the way our family does things and how the world works in general right now. 

Salo likes to play with lego, play with with cars, he likes to ride his bike, go to the park, swim, and play dress-up. He likes the color red, loves Superman, lions, and monkeys.

Sofía (aka Sofi, Chofis) - age 2

Sofi has got the personality to run a household of 4 older brother! haha She is a girl full of life and fun and determination. She is a big people person and loves to be with anyone, but at the same time, rarely lets mama out of her sight. 

She loves to play with play dough, with cars, ride her little bike, be with people, wrestle with daddy and the boys, and she likes pigs at the moment.

She also likes to pick out her own clothes, change her shoes about 10 times per day, and always have a "moño" (bow) in her hair.

Tara 

I don't think it's hard to guess that I've been a little busy with mothering 5 kids! It has made life quite a bit fuller with adding two kids, although I think it's mostly because of their ages and that they need more attention and care at those ages. So it's expected and fun but I do find that I am still figuring out a new routine and balance with 5 kids. I'm so thankful that they all get along well and are happy for the most part!

Besides taking care of the kids and alllll that this entails....

I am a wife! and all that this entails :)

I also am involved in our ministry through leading two weekly ladies Bible studies, meeting with women one-on-one for mentor-ship, meeting with women and families weekly, volunteering monthly at Sofia's orphanage, hosting two weekend Bible studies weekly, teaching Sunday School, being part of our missionary team planning meeting and prayer times weekly, etc.

It all adds up to too much to do in one week...and I'm currently evaluating and figuring out, you guessed it, a new routine!

As far as enjoyment, I enjoy times of reflection, reading for fun and for learning, being with closer friends, skyping with family, relaxing and hanging out as a family of 7, organizing things (ha! yes), watching a couple of shows, drinking coffee, biking in the park, baking cakes here and there, and being creative in different ways.

Logan thought he was sooo funnyy....

Dallas

Dallas is also busy being a dad to 5 kids now! Between everything else he does, he has been trying to be intentional about spending on-on-one time with each of the boys as they go through adapting to new siblings and a new family. I think this has helped them to not "get lost" in the mix and in the process.

His focus is also our ministry, and he has meetings and prayer times each week with our missionary team, spends time planning and brainstorming and researching and praying and prepping for upcoming ministry things, preps and studies for the weekend Bible studies and services, meets with men and youth in the evenings for one-on-one mentor-ship or counseling, and many other things. Ministry is hard to pinpoint as it changes throughout the week but he enjoys the spontaneity of it and also enjoys visioning for our church plant.

He also is busy with another course towards his Counseling Masters online, which means a lot of homework.

And he enjoys mountain biking, biking as a family, wrestling with the kids, playing some sports with the boys, bbqing, etc

SOOOO that is a quick update on life these days! There is much we are processing and learning and much we are thankful for at the same time. God is good.

EVERYDAY ENCOUNTERS

Ongoing discipleship and investment into people's leaves means meeting them where they are at, and this often includes meeting up with those we mentor, disciple, and invest in through everyday activities. 

Like helping our co-workers find a puppy and taking them to a church member's house who hasn't been attending for a while. Her dog just had puppies, so they get a puppy and we get to encourage someone who has been struggling lately.

And like checking out a big new sports store to look for a few things we need, but going to that one specifically because we heard it's good but also because one of our church members started working there. We were able to brighten his day and show some interest in his life, as he had been hinting at us to come visit him there.

And like walking with the kids to the local park and meeting up with a neighbor who, after meeting our 2 kiddos, shared that her and husband have wanted another child for many years and looked into adoption but hadn't been able to find information on how to go about it. I was able to encourage her to take that step and sent her the phone number to call.

And like having two of my ladies Bible study ladies and their kids over for lunch so that the kids could play, giving us an opportunity to meet together outside of a Bible study time. This leads to different topics and types of conversation. 

And out of that meeting we were also invested in! One of the ladies heard me commenting on us thinking about needing a bigger fridge with more kids (our fridge is a basic, small fridge) and she said she had just been asking God to show her who to give her fridge to. So her and her husband decided to give us their side-by-side fridge that needed a bit of repair. We repaired it and now we have a bigger fridge. What a blessing to be invested in and cared for as well.

WE HAVE OUR 2 KIDS (+3) UNDER OUR ROOF!!

We are still in a little shock and awe, but we now have our 2 kids that we are in process of adopting living with us!!

I know we said just recently that it seemed like the process of visitations with our little boy, Salomón, would be another few months, based on what we were being told as far as process, but last week it was decided that he was ready and that it was best for him to come. It came as a very, very welcome surprise to us.

So we had a few days notice that he would be coming, which we took advantage of by moving beds around and setting up room for his clothes in the boy's closet, and then we waited and got a call Monday afternoon to pick him up in an hour! The 4 boys are together in one room and Sofía has her own room. Not because she is spoiled! 😅 but because he is used to sharing with many boys (and our 3 boys have always shared a room) and we felt it would make him more comfortable.

We are so thankful for the people involved in working with him and the process and we are so thankful to God for bringing the two siblings back together and for them becoming part of our family 💓 Of course it is hard for him as it's a huge transition (he is 4) but we are amazed at how well he is doing. 

                              

Now, they are not officially adopted yet - that will take a while yet as there is more paperwork to do. But in our hearts they are ours. Our boys are aware of the dynamics and we talk together about how while they are with us, they are our family and we love them as such. And the boys have been so amazing with both of the kids! They are proud to tell people that they are part of our family.

My prayer for Salomón and Sofía. That One is God.

NEW TEAM MEMBERS

These last couple of weeks we have been busy welcoming, getting to know, and helping our new team members settle in!

Angel and Blanca and their 4 kids moved to Guadalajara to join our church planting team. They've been living in Canada for almost 15 years where they were working in church planting as well, so we are excited to work with them and experience life together here in Mexico. It's been so enjoyable so far just getting together and visiting and beginning to share and dream together about the church plant.

The kids have also hit it off really well, as their 3 oldest will be in the same grade as our 3 oldest, and they have much the same life experiences with all having grown up in a culture other than their parent's original culture.

The summer months are always a little hit and miss with everyone being around for Bible studies but we are having Angel and Blanca meet the different people in our groups and they are out and about a lot in their neighborhood and on the streets meeting the neighbors.

Continue to pray for them and for ourselves as we form this team and for the people they will come into contact with that are looking for purpose in life, that as a church body we will together be that light in the darkness here in this city!

ADOPTION UPDATE & HOW WE'RE ALL ADJUSTING

Once again, while I would love to share pictures here on the blog of our two that we are in the process of adopting here in Mexico, I will need to hold off until it's more official. But, we are asked often about where we are at with the adoption so I'll give a quick update.

Our little girl has been living with us for just over 4 months now! We are fostering her while we wait on the legal processes of having parental rights revoked, for both her and her brother. We have no control over that paperwork and so it is a waiting game. Our adoption certification was finished last year in August and so we are ready whenever they are!

Because we met our little boy that much later after we met our little girl (they are siblings but they were separated), visitation was also started that much later. He is also older, having turned 4 in May, and so is more aware of what this means and Mexico's CFS is working to make the transition as smooth as possible for him. He comes to our house one day a week and every week we see him opening up more and more. Please pray that he will transition well and that he will thrive and continue to be a joyful little guy! Pray also for the social workers that make the decisions as to when he is ready to move in permanently.

Please continue to pray also for the paperwork. Parental rights need to be revoked and then we can begin the actual adoption paperwork! In the meantime we hope to have them together in our home in the next few months sometime.

In other news, our little girl turned 2 on Monday! It's hard to believe we first saw her when she was 2 months old. As soon as we saw her that first day, we felt a tug to ask about her and here we are. She is so full of enthusiasm for life and we feel privileged to have the opportunity to provide her with a loving family and to give her a place to belong, praying that she will rest in that and find refuge in God as she grows and reflects on her life.

The boys are also doing really well with the adjustment of having a sister and a toddler in the house. It means being quite sometimes when she is napping, having a little less time with us as parents, not being able to go to the movie theatre because you have to be 3 to go to the movies here ;) but they love her and have accepted her as part of their life and family. 

We often ask how they're feeling or what they're thinking and I think that helps, at least it makes me feel I'm checking in if nothing else! They are proud to call her their sister though. She came along with me to Carter's zoo field trip and Carter wanted her with him all of the time so he could show her off. That's great to see (may-hap there is a girl he wants to impress??). They are also talking about where our little boy will sleep, are praying for him every day, and waiting for him to come also.

It's taken Dallas and I some getting used to also. Going back to a toddler after having all 3 kids in school already has been a bit of a transition. I'm still getting used to having a child at home all day with me...although in reality, it means her going a lot of places with me. I lead 2 ladies Bible studies on 2 mornings and attend another one, so it makes it a little tougher when you have a 2 year old along. However if Dallas is working at home in the morning he can keep her at home while she naps or things like that, which makes it easier. 

We're getting more used to it though and it's feeling more natural to have a young one again. Our older 3 are so independent already and I need to be ok with having more demands on me with a two year old. And now seeing the age difference between her and Carter makes me want to hang on harder to Carter as he seems so old now and I don't want him to leave me!! ha! He's 11, still young I know, but I can't imagine them not being here. I feel like I'm becoming a middle aged mom and it's hard to believe that soon I'll be that 50 year old mom with an empty nest. All right, I'm starting to digress. I'm not even 40 yet. 

Anyways, to sum up, we are so thankful for the lives God has given these 2 kids and so thankful to see how things are going right now with the adoption process. We have no guarantees that the adoption will be finalized, as things can happen with foster care, but we are thankful for the moment, thankful for coffee when toddlers don't want to nap, thankful for our family, and thankful that God has blessed us with a daughter and another son right now. 

A Field Trip for the kids means a Field Trip for the moms

It's that time of year again where all of the classes go on one last field trip to finish off their time in the grade they're in. Since all 3 of our boys are in elementary still, the moms are invited to come along and help chaperone the group. 

I have gone on many field trips over the years, mostly to the zoo as that's the one I enjoy signing up for. We have one of the best zoos here in Guadalajara! 

So today I went along with Carter's grade, which is grade 5. I must say, I enjoyed this grade more than the younger grades. Not because of the kids! But because this age is just so much more independent and you don't need to worry quite so much about someone going missing by accident. 

Only 6 of us moms went along on the trip, but they happen to be 6 that I enjoy being with a lot from this grade, so we had just as much fun as the kids did. Most of these ladies I've known since Carter was in kindergarten, so 6 years now.

There is a Safari that you go on as well and I gave my phone to Carter for this so he could get some pictures.....he was one of the few that did not have their own phone along (as he does not have one!) and he felt a little left out. But I told him that I think he can enjoy seeing things much more without having to see it all through a video on a little screen the whole day and he was fine with that.

I know at this age they like to fit in...and that's a balance we're working through, in knowing what to allow our kids to have and do to not feel "out" of things but also helping them be human beings that are happy even without a screen! It's a hard one in this day and age where 10 years old are taking phones everywhere.

So anyway, the following pictures are from Carter :)

To finish off the day we also went on the Sky Zoo which is a slow meandering ride over top of the zoo.

A few other things I learned today:

1. Our kids will need to learn what are good thing to take pictures of if they plan on having the privilege of using my phone once in a while. In other words, taking pictures of certain animal parts or of ostriches mating is maybe not the best choice ;) Yes, I know, everyone else took the same pictures.

2. One mother (not pictured) shared with me many the different ways there are to cross into the US without being detected, even today with all of the security.

3. Carter has good friends! Yes, really! I love seeing him with them and I love that he (and his brothers) have invited many to a local Bible camp this summer and today 2 mothers confirmed that they will send their kids with Carter and 4 confirmed that they will send their kids with Logan! Our kids are influencing their friends whether they know it or not. Pray for these kids and their parents that we continue to rub shoulders with.

Grandpa Harder's passing

Just over a week ago, my Grandpa Harder passed away. It was quite sudden and it's still hard to believe that it actually happened.

I was able to go to Canada for 6 days to be with family and to be part of the funeral, which I am SO thankful for. Being far away can make things not seem real when they happen over there and I know it was part of the good-bye process for me to be able to be there in person. I also am grateful to have been there with all of my brothers and be able to support my mom and my Grandma, and uncles.

I just want to share here the tribute that I shared at the funeral on behalf of my brothers and I.

The first memories I have of Grandpa are from when he and my Grandma came to visit us on in Paraguay where we were growing up as missionary kids. Even though we lived far away from each other for several years, we always knew that he loved us grand kids and knew him as a grandpa full of kindness, eager to help anyone he could, with interest and knowledge in a wide range of topics, and with a genuine appreciation and joy for life. We also saw his love for serving others and God, which was evidenced in him singing and playing the guitar and harmonica in church while visiting us and his joy in building the staircase at the mission property for us, which still stands 25 years later.

Several years later when we had moved back to live in Kleefeld, we spent many days and Sunday dinners at his and Grandma’s house. He was good at so many things and he always allowed us to learn what he knew by doing and experiencing, not just by hearing about it – he showed us how to use the many tools in his shop to build different things, how to work his riding lawn mower, how to play golf, how to make the perfect juice for Sunday dinner, and how to appreciate playing music, among many other things. We also spent many hours hearing his stories about his growing up years, playing dominoes, having wiener roasts, watching golf, attending football and hockey games, and just learning from his life and his example of faith in God.  

As we grew older, we appreciated even more things about Grandpa. We saw the way he continued to volunteer and serve his whole life and learned from his commitment to his family and to his church. We also appreciated greatly the way he always gave us words of encouragement and affirmation to make sure we knew that he was praying for us, that God was with us, and that we were valued by him. He also gave this same love and encouragement to all of our kids, his great-grandchildren, who loved him just as much. Even though they are young and have never lived in the same town never mind the same province or country, they have many good memories of their time with Grandpa because of the efforts he took to make sure he had a close relationship with them. He had a way of making you feel cared for even in a short amount of time. Each person that came into his home felt welcome and felt his hospitality, which included good food but also a genuine care for you as a person.

We will miss our Grandpa a lot and thinking of him makes me smile through the tears because of the person he was. We don’t need to be sad for him and all that he’ll miss here on earth, because where he is in a place with so much more joy than we can even imagine. But I know that doesn’t mean that we won’t be sad as we think of being without him, so let’s encourage each other and be there for one another in the same way that he taught us to do in the many years that we had with him here.

I went to a ladies retreat - THRIVE 2018

6 months ago, some fellow missionary women here in Guadalajara told me about an organization called Thrive.

Thrive is an organization that ministers to missionary women working in cross-cultural settings and they put on 4 day spiritual retreats all over the world. They have divided the globe into regions and they make sure they go to each region at least one time every two years, and now in April they were coming to Puerto Vallarta.

There are a few women that run the ministry and then volunteers sign up to come as well. The volunteers are made up of professional counselors, those that want to come to pray and encourage, a couple of hair stylists and massage therapists, and those that want to come and serve in any way.

And get this, they raise all of the funds for all of the missionary women! Meaning that in order to attend, we had to pay a minimal registration fee and get ourselves there. The rest of the stay was completely covered by donars.

I am so thankful for this opportunity to attend and that I got to go! We have had several months, half a year, of non stop busyness and I have been feeling that I haven't had the space to process life recently and spend that extended time resting in God. The speaker that came spoke on topics that we KNOW to be true, but that sometimes we forget to believe.

God is Sovereign

God is Good

God is Love

It was a timely retreat for me.

I also enjoyed so much the times of discussion. We were split into small groups that we spent much of the time with in discussion and prayer. This was my group, made up of 2 leaders and missionary women from all over Mexico. 

I also enjoyed spending time with fellow missionary from Guadalajara, Melissa, who I went there with and who I roomed with. We don't get together a lot with missionaries from other agencies here so it was nice to have a longer to visit as well.

I also enjoyed meeting women in other cities of Mexico and building friendships with them. Everyone there is working cross-culturally so we "get" each other. It was interesting too to play the "Mennonite game" and make connections! One knew my brother and sister-in-law from language school in Texas. One was the niece of my mom's friend in Canada. One knows some of our friends from the States.

Thrive also works in between retreats offering their services to missions agencies by offering mentoring, coaching, and counseling over Skype to women that work cross-culturally. They have such a good handle on the needs of missionary women and I would encourage missions agencies to take advantage of this ministry as another member care tool!

So, I wish I could go every year :) Recharges the batteries. 

Thankfully, God is here right with us where we all are and amidst the busyness of life we need to work hard at carving out time for him each day, week, month, year. Our circumstances can overtake our minds but I want God overtaking my thoughts before anything else.

9 days with our home church youth group!

For the week leading up to Easter, we hosted our youth group from our home church in Canada - Kleefeld EMC.

There were 9 youth and 5 leaders and we looked forward to it a lot as we know all of the leaders and knew it would be a great week together! The leaders include those that mentor us (our pastor) and that we have mentored (our previous youth) and that we currently mentor (Paulina, from our church here in Gdl but who is studying at Steinbach Bible College in Canada and attending our home church there, and who Dallas will be performing the wedding ceremony for in July!). It's neat to see the way different generations and groups of people can work together.

Our house was the central command station for all things food and debrief related ;) Our house is small but thankfully, youth don't care about cramming! 

We are so thankful also for those that helped us in planning and running the week, including those in our cell groups, we couldn't have done it without them! They helped drive the youth around, inviting their friends and people they're reaching out to to the different outreach event, and hosting with us. We are excited when we see the local believers working together.

The day they arrived, we did a bit of orientation and then spent some time in prayer for the upcoming week. That evening we put on a youth event, where we and our cell groups invited contacts to come out for a Cultural Event. Youth events here often mean anyone is welcome, and we had from little kids up until parents of the youth.

We did a bit of a talent show, music, played hockey, and had pizza together. Our prayer is that those that were invited will have come away with a positive view of Christians and that this can prompt conversations with those that invited them.

 

The next day was Palm Sunday and we took the group out to Los Chorros de Tala, which is a natural park with a waterfall, a creek, and a swimming pool. Some from our cell group went as well and we had a service there at the park and then spent the day together. 

For Monday we planned a Kid's Club here in our gated community and had a few of our kid's school friends come out, plus some from here in our community. Unfortunately, I didn't get any pictures as I was in charge and it went by quickly :) We also had some down time that afternoon and then spent some time in prayer looking over the city of Guadalajara from 2 high places. 

Tuesday they headed to downtown Guadalajara for our traditional Picture Scavenger Hunt that we do with teams that come! They split into groups and were given a list of things to find and to take pictures of. This included touring the Catholic Cathedral, visiting some historical buildings, and touring a typical market. 

Later in the evening we had one of Paulina's friends come and share about the traditional Catholic pilgrimage that is happening right now, that he took part of. This is a path that people walk for two days in order to spend time in prayer to the Virgin of Talpa, the town they walk to. 

After the first number of days in the city and exposure to urban life and ministry, we took the group to the Orphanage Ranchito Con Eperanza (Little Ranch with Hope), where they spent the next 4 days. I know this was a big highlight for many of them, as they were able to do several types of ministry. Some worked on the farm feeding cows and harvesting honey, some worked in pouring a cement floor, some helped with peeling and cutting tons of fruits and veggies, and some read and did activities with the kids. This is the Orphanage that Dallas and I and our cell groups volunteer at regularly and where our little girl is from.

 The orphanage is in a small town an hour out of the city and as the only Christian influence there, they periodically put on Kids Clubs and invite the town kids. One afternoon we did this with them and they had 30 kids come out in addition to the 23 they have at the orphanage. 

 And, one of the days while they were at the orphanage, Dallas and I skipped out and attended a wedding! We did pre-marital counseling with a young couple last summer and now they were getting married. Their parents are good friends of ours from our kid's school, as their younger son is in Carter's grade, so we had a table full of friends from school there to hang out with!

This is Karla, a mom friend who was one of the first I ever met here in Gdl almost 7 years ago! How time flies.

So, that was our week!! There are many stories to tell and I know that each person on the team would have different perspectives and stories. For us, we see the ministry opportunities and ways the team helped us with our ministry and reaching out to people. We see the ways people worked together and advanced God's kingdom.

It was also a tiring week for Dallas and I as along with the planning and running of the week, we had our 4 kids with us plus had Brady visit the hospital twice while they were here (he has a knee effusion, which we are still working on solving). But, we are thankful for the week and to God for working despite our weakness' and for giving us joy. Our prayer is that the week will be something the youth will look back on and remember the ways they were impacted and have this change them even in small ways, and that makes it all worth it!